The ability to cook well, clean, raise children and be willing in the bedroom may be the stereotypical view of what men look for in a wife, but this image is perhaps an outdated throwback to the attitudes of the early part of the last century. Times have changed dramatically, and as the role of women in society has changed, so too has men’s expectations.

Clearly the specific qualities that a man looks for in a wife will depend on each individual man, but are there some common personality traits and qualities that men look for when choosing a woman to settle down with?

Qualities that men look for in a wife

It would be impossible to say with any degree of authority what men as a whole look for when seeking a wife, but there are perhaps a selection of qualities that are important to varying degrees with each individual.

Independence - While in the past women were seen as subservient to men and were expected to depend on them to provide a good life for the family, modern women are considered equals in the workplace and the home. In parallel with this steady development, men have altered their perception of what is desirable in a partner. Independence, both financial and emotional, is seen as a positive quality in a woman, and to many modern men this is preferable to a wife that is dependent or clingy.

Common interests - Men like to be able to share their interests with their partner. Having common interests will not only attract the interest of a potential suitor, it will also provide a solid foundation for a lasting relationship.

Confidence - While in the past women were often expected to play the submissive role in the relationship and rely on the man to take control of most situations, today men look for a woman who will be an equal partner. Instead of insecurity, they want a woman who is self-assured in both her looks and her personality, and one who will stand up for herself.

Sexually active - It’s true that most men are looking for a partner who enjoys sex, and in this respect little has changed in thousands of years. But as with other elements of the relationship, many prefer a woman who is sexually confident and not simply submissive.

Physical Attractiveness - While it is not the be and end all, it’s important that both partners are sexually attracted to each other or there may be something missing in the relationship. This doesn’t require the woman to look like a supermodel, simply to be attractive to the personal tastes of her spouse.

Loyal - Both men and women want to know that they can rely on their spouse to stick by them through both good and bad times. They also want to know that their partner will remain faithful and will not hurt them.

Caring and supportive - While many men put up a tough macho exterior in public, in the privacy of their own home they need to know that they are cared for and valued. A woman who will provide emotional support in times of trouble and a shoulder to lean on is often considered exceptional wife material.

Honesty - Before they can fully share themselves in a marriage, men need to know that they can trust their partner and rely on them to be truthful in everything they do and say.

Intelligence - Many men seek a wife who is their intellectual equal. A woman lacking intelligence may be seen as boring in the long term, while one who is far smarter than them may be perceived as a threat. A harmonious match often requires that both partners can communicate with each other on an even footing, with neither talking down to the other nor misunderstanding what is said.

Similar life perspective - Any relationship that is to last requires both partners to be on the same page and to want similar things out of life. Two people sharing one life may find it difficult if their views clash. This applies to all aspects of life, from views on children and work ethic to spirituality and holidays.

Astrological love compatibility

While the majority of men may not be consciously seeking a match based on their star signs, everyone wants to share their life with a lover with whom they are compatible. By studying the Chinese astrological calendar and the western zodiac it is possible to determine whether two people may be suited for a romantic relationship based on the year and date of their birth. An experienced astrologer can provide an in-depth reading which also factors in more detailed factors such as the precise time and location of birth.

The importance of being yourself

The qualities discussed here and many others vary in the degree to which they are desired or needed by a man. But perhaps the most essential quality sought after, and one which is universal, is a partner who will be herself and who is comfortable within her own skin.